Dan Gilbert, Harvard University, Ted Talk:
"...We synthesize happiness, but we think happiness is a thing to be found. Now, you don’t need me to tell you, give you too many examples of people synthesizing happiness, I suspect. Though I’m going to show you some experimental evidence, you don’t have to look very far for evidence.
"As a challenge to myself, since I say this once in a while in lectures, I took a copy of the New York Times and tried to find some instances of people synthesizing happiness. Here are three guys synthesizing happiness.
"Who are these characters who are so happy? Well the first one is Jim Wright. Some of you are old enough to remember: he was the chairman of the House of Representatives and he resigned in disgrace when this young Republican named Newt Gingrich found out about a shady book deal he had done. He lost everything. The most powerful Democrat in the country lost everything. He lost his money, he lost his power. What does he have to say all these years later about it? “I am so much better off physically, financially, mentally and in almost every other way.” What other way would there be to be better off? Vegetably? Minerally? Animally? He’s pretty much covered them there.
"Moreese Bickham is somebody you’ve never heard of. Moreese Bickham uttered these words upon being released. He was 78 years old. He’d spent 37 years in a Louisiana State Penitentiary for a crime he didn’t commit. He was ultimately exonerated at the age of 78 through DNA evidence. What did he say about his experience? “I don’t have one minute’s regret. It was a glorious experience.” Glorious! This guy is not saying, ;Well, there were some nice guys. They had a gym.' 'Glorious,' a word we usually reserve for something like a religious experience.
"And then finally — you know, the best of all possible worlds — some of you recognize this young photo of Pete Best, who was the original drummer for the Beatles, until they, you know, sent him out on an errand and snuck away and picked up Ringo on a tour. Well, in 1994, when Pete Best was interviewed — yes, he’s still a drummer; yes, he’s a studio musician — he had this to say: 'I’m happier than I would have been with the Beatles.'
"Okay. There’s something important to be learned from these people, and it is the secret of happiness. Here it is, finally to be revealed.
"First: accrue wealth, power, and prestige, then lose it.
Second: spend as much of your life in prison as you possibly can.
Third: make somebody else really, really rich. And finally: never ever join the Beatles..."
I want to suggest to you that synthetic happiness is every bit as real and enduring as the kind of happiness you stumble upon when you get exactly what you were aiming for. I’m a scientist, so I’m going to do this not with rhetoric, but by marinating you in a little bit of data.
Let me first show you an experimental paradigm that is used to demonstrate the synthesis of happiness among regular old folks. And this isn’t mine. It’s a 50-year-old paradigm called the free choice paradigm. It’s very simple. You bring in, say, six objects, and you ask a subject to rank them from the most to the least liked. In this case, because this experiment uses them, these are Monet prints. So, everybody can rank these Monet prints from the one they like the most, to the one they like the least.
Now we give you a choice: “We happen to have some extra prints in the closet. We’re going to give you one as your prize to take home. We happen to have number three and number four,” we tell the subject. This is a bit of a difficult choice, because neither one is preferred strongly to the other, but naturally, people tend to pick number three because they liked it a little better than number four.
Sometime later — it could be 15 minutes; it could be 15 days — the same stimuli are put before the subject, and the subject is asked to re-rank the stimuli. “Tell us how much you like them now.” What happens? Watch as happiness is synthesized. This is the result that has been replicated over and over again. You’re watching happiness be synthesized. Would you like to see it again? Happiness! “The one I got is really better than I thought! That other one I didn’t get sucks!” That’s the synthesis of happiness.
Now, what’s the right response to that? “Yeah, right!” Now, here’s the experiment we did, and I hope this is going to convince you that “Yeah, right!” was not the right response.
We did this experiment with a group of patients who had anterograde amnesia. These are hospitalized patients. Most of them have Korsakoff’s syndrome, a polyneuritic psychosis. They drank way too much, and they can’t make new memories. Okay? They remember their childhood, but if you walk in and introduce yourself, and then leave the room, when you come back, they don’t know who you are.
We took our Monet prints to the hospital. And we asked these patients to rank them from the one they liked the most to the one they liked the least. We then gave them the choice between number three and number four. Like everybody else, they said, “Gee, thanks Doc! That’s great! I could use a new print. I’ll take number three.” We explained we would have number three mailed to them. We gathered up our materials and we went out of the room, and counted to a half hour.
Back into the room, we say, “Hi, we’re back.” The patients, bless them, say, “Ah, Doc, I’m sorry, I’ve got a memory problem; that’s why I’m here. If I’ve met you before, I don’t remember.”
“Really, you don’t remember? I was just here with the Monet prints?”
“Sorry, Doc, I just don’t have a clue.”
“No problem, Jim. All I want you to do is rank these for me from the one you like the most to the one you like the least.”
What do they do? Well, let’s first check and make sure they’re really amnesiac. We ask these amnesiac patients to tell us which one they own, which one they chose last time, which one is theirs. And what we find is amnesiac patients just guess. These are normal controls, where if I did this with you, all of you would know which print you chose. But if I do this with amnesiac patients, they don’t have a clue. They can’t pick their print out of a lineup.
Here’s what normal controls do: they synthesize happiness. Right? This is the change in liking score, the change from the first time they ranked to the second time they ranked. Normal controls show — that was the magic I showed you; now I’m showing it to you in graphical form — “The one I own is better than I thought. The one I didn’t own, the one I left behind, is not as good as I thought.” Amnesiacs do exactly the same thing. Think about this result.
These people like better the one they own, but they don’t know they own it. “Yeah, right” is not the right response. What these people did when they synthesized happiness is they really, truly changed their affective, hedonic, aesthetic reactions to that poster. They’re not just saying it because they own it, because they don’t know they own it.
Now, when psychologists show you bars, you know that they are showing you averages of lots of people. And yet, all of us have this psychological immune system, this capacity to synthesize happiness, but some of us do this trick better than others. And some situations allow anybody to do it more effectively than other situations do. It turns out that freedom — the ability to make up your mind and change your mind — is the friend of natural happiness, because it allows you to choose among all those delicious futures and find the one that you would most enjoy. But freedom to choose, to change and make up your mind, is the enemy of synthetic happiness.
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Tonight –what you are about to hear –is the most expensive Derasha I have ever given.
It seems that there has been a recent explosion of books etc. the subject about which we are about to endeavor to speak.
Over the past few days –and thank Gd for Amazon Prime and same day delivery! –I have purchased and read countless book, essays, scientific reviews, university studies –all on the topic of this evening.
In fact, if I wanted to, I can spend the next 45-1hour not mentioning any Torah per se, and just sharing fascinating study after study, vignette of wisdom after vignette of wisdom.
I think many would in fact enjoy that.
But I am not about to do so. This is a Shabbos Shuva drasha after all.
I also purchased Sefarim on the topic of Happiness. I found at least 20.
After purchasing the first one ('Sod Simchah', Hebrew), I was shocked to discover that it was close to 600 pages in length!
Even more shocking was when I turned to the 'share blast and saw that this was 'Krach Aleph' (volume one)!!!
They say that there are two types of SCULPTERS –those that create through addition, and, those that create through subtraction.
The first start with nothing and add material until they have a finished product.
The latter, who creates through addition, starts with a huge lump of rock, and must chip away until he finds his muse.
This Drasha is of the latter type; as I had to chip away so much material to only discuss a small amount in a variable sea of information.
But I must warn everyone: This is not an easy topic.
This is true even though if we should take a poll and asked, “What is it that you really want out if life”, nine out of ten will likely respond “I just want to be happy” - - -neverthelss it is not a topic often discussed.
Why?
Because, I think, there are some uncomfortable truths that this topic uncovers. It, sometimes, forces all of us to face our demons. And for some, these are demons we have been facing all of our lives.
I NEED TO SAY ON THE OUTSET THAT I AM WELL AWARE THAT THERE ARE THOSE WHO SUFFER FROM CLINICAL DEPRESSION, AND, THOSE THAT ARE IN SEVERE CIRCUMSTANCES.
IT IS NOT TO THEM TO WHOM I AM SPEAKING.
ALTHOUGH, THEY TOO MAY HAVE WHAT TO GAIN FROMTHIS LECTURE.
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To demonstrate how hard this topic is to discuss, let me quote from an old New York Magazine article that may his home for us here in NYC.
This article's main thrust was to see if Happiness can be measured by ZIP CODE:
"Some Dark Thoughts on Happiness
"More and more psychologists and researchers believe they know what makes people happy. But the question is, does a New Yorker want to be happy?
"....The happiest [ZIP CODE], he reports, is Branson, Missouri’s.
"...Nonetheless, I think the results are kind of interesting. Missoula, Montana. Rural Minnesota. Rural Indiana. Rural Alabama. Savannah, Georgia. The Outer Banks. Is there a theme here? There’s a theme here. It seems to run through the Bible Belt and go straight up north. And if you want to know the absolutely most miserable Zip Code—and this is based on a very large number of people—it seems to start with 101.”
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Tonight, we will travel to 'The Gush', then fly to JFK and arrive at YU. After that, we will cross the GWB into New Jersey and make our way to BMG in Lakewood.
But first, let us ask the central question we will be focusing on tonight:
Is Happiness a Mood or a Virtue; or, Is it a Feeling or a Behavior?
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We will start with some Mamarei Chazal and Pesukim that seem to suggest an answer to the above question:
ר' ברוקא חוזאה הוה שכיח בשוקא דבי לפט הוה שכיח אליהו גביה א"ל איכא בהאי שוקא בר עלמא דאתי א"ל לא אדהכי והכי חזא לההוא גברא דהוה סיים מסאני אוכמי ולא רמי חוטא דתכלתא בגלימיה א"ל האי בר עלמא דאתי הוא רהט בתריה א"ל מאי עובדך א"ל זיל האידנא ותא למחר למחר א"ל מאי עובדך א"ל זנדוקנא אנא ואסרנא גברי לחוד ונשי לחוד ורמינא פורייאי בין הני להני כי היכי דלא ליתו לידי איסורא ...א"ל מאי טעמא לית לך חוטי ורמית מסאני אוכמי א"ל עיילנא ונפיקנא ביני נכרים כי היכי דלא לידעו דיהודאה אנא כי הוו גזרי גזירתא מודענא להו לרבנן ובעו רחמי ומבטלי לגזירתייהו...אדהכי והכי אתו הנך תרי אתי א"ל הנך נמי בני עלמא דאתי נינהו אזל לגבייהו אמר להו מאי עובדייכו אמרו ליה אינשי בדוחי אנן מבדחינן עציבי אי נמי כי חזינן בי תרי דאית להו תיגרא בהדייהו טרחינן ועבדינן להו שלמא
Rabbi Beroka Ḥoza’a was often found in the market of Bei Lefet, and Elijah the Prophet would often appear to him. Once Rabbi Beroka said to Elijah: Of all the people who come here, is there anyone in this market worthy of the World-to-Come? He said to him: No. In the meantime, Rabbi Beroka saw a man who was wearing black shoes, contrary to Jewish custom, and who did not place the sky-blue, dyed thread of ritual fringes on his garment. Elijah said to Rabbi Beroka: That man is worthy of the World-to-Come. Rabbi Beroka ran after the man and said to him: What is your occupation? The man said to him: Go away now, as I have no time, but come back tomorrow and we will talk. The next day, Rabbi Beroka arrived and again said to him: What is your occupation? The man said to him: I am a prison guard [zandukana], and I imprison the men separately and the women separately, and I place my bed between them so that they will not come to transgression. ...Rabbi Beroka said to him: What is the reason that you do not have threads of ritual fringes, and why do you wear black shoes? The man said to him: Since I come and go among gentiles, I dress this way so that they will not know that I am a Jew. When they issue a decree, I inform the Sages, and they pray for mercy and annul the decree. ...In the meantime, two brothers came to the marketplace. Elijah said to Rabbi Beroka: These two also have a share in the World-to-Come. Rabbi Beroka went over to the men and said to them: What is your occupation? They said to him: We are jesters, and we cheer up the depressed. Alternatively, when we see two people who have a quarrel between them, we strive to make peace.
In a Marketplace of perhaps thousands Eliyahu stated that only a handful of people were deserving of the World to Come.
The first one should not be a surprise, as he risked his job -his life -for the sake of Kedusha.
But the second, the brothers who were comedians, is simply fascinating!
It would also seem from this Gemara that Happiness is a MOOD, to be improved upon by others bring us Joy. It is but a FEELING.
However, the other sources tell us otherwise:
(יג) לֵ֣ב שָׂ֭מֵחַ יֵיטִ֣ב פָּנִ֑ים וּבְעַצְּבַת־לֵ֝ב ר֣וּחַ נְכֵאָֽה׃
(13) A joyful heart makes a cheerful face; A sad heart makes a despondent mood.
Is not Shlomo HaMelech telling us the obvious?
Rather, he is teaching us an important ideal: One's facial expression can effect the inside.
Once -in 10th grade -i was waking around the Yeshiva halls with a despondent look upon my face.
A Rebbe came over to me and said, "Moshe! Your face is a Reshus Harabim (a Halchic team, meaning a Public Domain). Walking around sad is like a Bor B'Reshus Harabaim" (A Halchic term for a damaging obstacle in a public domain that may cause others injury; see Talmud Bava Kama).
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This next verse makes the point that Happiness is a Virtue, or, a Behavior even more clear:
(מז) תַּ֗חַת אֲשֶׁ֤ר לֹא־עָבַ֙דְתָּ֙ אֶת־ה' אֱלֹקֶ֔יךָ בְּשִׂמְחָ֖ה וּבְט֣וּב לֵבָ֑ב מֵרֹ֖ב כֹּֽל׃
(47) Because you would not serve the LORD your God in joy and gladness over the abundance of everything,
And, of course, the most famous verse asserting that Happiness is not simply a MOOD but an OBLIGATION:
(ב) עִבְד֣וּ אֶת־ה' בְּשִׂמְחָ֑ה בֹּ֥אוּ לְ֝פָנָ֗יו בִּרְנָנָֽה׃
(2) worship the LORD in gladness; come into His presence with shouts of joy.
The listener will not the one Chazal I did NOT mention; perhaps the most famous one:
"Mitzvah Gedoleh L'hiyos B'Simcha Tomid"
This is because it is not at all a Chazal!
Rather it was written about 200 years ago by none other than Rav Nachman of Breslov!!!
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Before we delve into the Obligation vs. Mood of Happiness, let us discover its role -if any -during these awesome and difficult days:
Rav Lichtenstein, Return and Renewal, p. 215 ff:
"And yet, can it be that the world of Teshuva - one of the major axes of Divine service -is wholly morose and depressing, with nothing to provide encouragement or to ennoble? Does the sun never pierce the clouds of guilt-induced crisis?
"Speaking for myself, my intuitive response is: Chas V'Shalom! Impossible! WIthin the context of Yom Kippur, there is evidence to suggest that at some point the sun break through and there is light again. IN the Shulchan Aruch there is a rule that after Yom Kippur one should eat a semi-festive meal for it is (still) somewhat a festival (Rema 624:5).
"And, to speak from my own interactions with the Rav z'l, if anybody needed something from him, the best time to speak to him was the night after Yom Kippur...
"But if we are looking for a sense of joy within the Teshuvah process...[I]s there some saving grace, some element of joy inherent in the process that is licit and perhaps even demanded, despite the pervasive anxiety and the sense of tension?...."
As we will soon see, he was not the only who questioned if Simcha has a place during these Days.
But First:
Did anyone else notice something EXCISED from the text this Rosh Hashana, and that will be again removed in the Yom Kippur Machzor as well?
Machzor for RH and YK:
Can we note what is missing?
וַתִּתֶּן לָֽנוּ ה' אֱלֹקֵֽינוּ בְּאַהֲבָה... אֶת־יוֹם הַזִּכָּרוֹן/הכפורים הַזֶּה.
'Modem B'Simcha'!
The fact that we have the MINHAG of omitting this phrase is actually an interesting debate.
What follows is taken from a Shour in Lakewood by Rav Yerucham Olshin, one their Roshei Yeshiva.
He begins with the language of the Tur:
Tur Oh'C Siman 582
וא"א ותתן לנו ה' אלקינו באהבה מועדים לשמחה חגים וזמנים לששון לא בר"ה ולא ביה"כ אבל רב שר שלום כתב אומר... בר"ה וביה"כ בין בתפלה בין בקדושה מועדים לשמחה חגים וזמנים לששון את יום הזכרון הזה שהרי כתיב אלה מועדי ה' בריש ענינא ובסוף ענינא וידבר משה את מועדי ה' וקאי אכל ענינא אפסח עצרת ר"ה ויה"כ סוכה ושמיני עצרת כולהו איתקוש להדדי לקרותו מועדי ה' מקראי קודש וכ"כ רב פלטוי גאון זצ"ל ותתן לנו ה' אלקינו באהבה מועדים לשמחה חגים וזמנים לששון את יום הזכרון הזה וכ"כ רב שמואל בן חפני מנהג... לאומרו ...וכתב רב האי שאין מנהג לומר מועדים לשמחה חגים וזמנים לששון אלא את יום הזכרון הזה זכרון תרועה וכן פשט המנהג
Interestingly, although those that argue for MOADIM B"SIMCHA's inclusion marshal obvious sources, Rav Hai Goan who argues AGAINST its inclusion offers no supporting texts.
We will soon return to this concern.
But first, how do we rule in this debate?:
.Shulchan Aruch ad loc
(ח) אינו אומר מועדים לשמחה חגים וזמנים לששון
So far, it would seem that the question of saying or omitting this phrase hinges upon if there is even a mitzvah of Simcha/Happiness during these Days of Awe.
Seemingly, the Shulchan Aruch rules that we are not to be 'happy' for he fallows the view to take out this 'happy' phrase from the Amida.
HOWEVER....
Shulchan Aruch Siman 597:1
(א) אוכלים ושותים ושמחים ואין מתענין בר"ה ולא בשב' שובה אמנם לא יאכלו כל שבעם למען לא יקלו ראשם ותהיה יראת ה' על פניהם:
Wait!!! Later he also states that we ARE to be happy on Rosh Hashanah?!?!?
How are we to make sense of both of these rulings -to omit the term Simcha from the Machzor AND the obligation to be happy?!
.Mishne Berrura ad loc
(א) אוכלים ושותים ושמחים - ר"ל אף שהוא יום הדין מ"מ מצוה של ושמחת בחגך שייך גם בו שגם הוא בכלל חג כדכתיב תקעו בחודש שופר בכסה ליום חגנו..."...ואל תעצבו..."
More peculiar still, is that the Shulchan Aruch took this ruling from none other than the Tur; the same Posek who rules NOT to say 'SIMCHAH'!:
.Tur ad loc
(א) ואוכלין ושותין ושמחין ואין להתענות בו כלל
And, in case the listener thinks that these questions are unique to Rosh Hashanah, let us look at a Midrash that teaches us something amazing about Yom Kippur as well:
שאילתא טו
"הני [= ראש השנה ויום הכיפורים] כיוון שאית בהו שמחה, כרגלים ומפסיקין [=לאבילות]."
ריבנו יהונתן מלוניל בפירושו על הרי"ף בסוף פרק בכל מערבין, עירובין: " בשמחת יו"ט של ר"ה ויוה"כ".
שו"ת מהר"ם, סימן עא
וחולה שיש בו סכנה ואוכל ביוה"כ, אומר מעין המאורע בבהמ"ז, ודבר פשוט [הוא], כיון דבהיתר נאכל, ואדרבא, מצוה הוא עביד, הוי לדידה יוה"כ כמו לדידן שאר ימים טובים.
This Midrash is teaching us a Halacha we all may know but have never considered its reasoning:
Shiva is cancelled by Yom Tov. It is ALSO canceled by Yom Kippur.
Says the Midrash that it is the SIMCHA of the Yom TOv that cause Shiva to be abrogated, and, since Yom Kippur and Rosh Hashanah have Simcha, shiva then is also removed!
So far we have TWO central questions:
1 -Is there a Mitzvah, a need, to be HAPPY during these Days of Awe
2 -If there is -as the Shulchan Aruch states -then how could we ALSO remove SIMCHA from the text of the Machzor?
Before answering those -and I am truly sorry to do this! -we need to first ask another question:
We know the sources (see Tur above) to indeed INCLUDE the term Simcha on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur (the verses in Torah seem to suggest that), but what could be the SOURCE not to?
To this question, the Vilna Gaon, in his comments to Shulchan Aruch, suggests the following -seemingly odd -choice as source.
First we will read his 'source'. Rav Olshin of Lakewood suggests that the Vilna Gaon;'s reading of the Gemara must follow the Rambam's reading as well -both in his early commentary of the Mishna and later in his Yad on the Laws of Chanukah:
...מכלל דבראש השנה ליכא הלל מ"ט אמר רבי אבהו אמרו מלאכי השרת לפני הקב"ה רבש"ע מפני מה אין ישראל אומרים שירה לפניך בר"ה וביום הכפורים אמר להם אפשר מלך יושב על כסא דין וספרי חיים וספרי מתים פתוחין לפניו וישראל אומרים שירה:
From the fact that the mishna states: When hallel is recited, one can conclude by inference that on Rosh HaShana there is no recitation of hallel. What is the reason that hallel is omitted on Rosh HaShana? Rabbi Abbahu said: The ministering angels said before the Holy One, Blessed be He: Master of the Universe, for what reason don’t the Jewish people recite songs of praise, i.e., hallel, before You on Rosh HaShana and on Yom Kippur? He said to them: Is it possible that while the King is sitting on the throne of judgment and the books of life and the books of death are open before Him, the Jewish people are reciting joyous songs of praise? Rosh HaShana and Yom Kippur are somber days of judgment whose mood is incompatible with the recitation of hallel.
Rambam understands this Gemara as not just prohibiting Hallel on Yom Kippur (and Rosh Hashanah) but as forbiding JOY as well:
Rambam to Mishna RH, 4:7;1
לפי שלא היו קורין הלל לא בראש השנה ולא ביום הכפורים לפי שהם ימי עבודה והכנעה ופחד ומורא מהשם ויראה ממנו ומברח ומנוס אליו ותשובה ותחנונים ובקשה כפרה וסליחה ובכל אלו הענינים אינו הגון השחוק והשמחה:
(ו) וְלֹא הַלֵּל שֶׁל חֲנֻכָּה בִּלְבַד הוּא שֶׁמִּדִּבְרֵי סוֹפְרִים אֶלָּא קְרִיאַת הַהַלֵּל לְעוֹלָם מִדִּבְרֵי סוֹפְרִים בְּכָל הַיָּמִים שֶׁגּוֹמְרִין בָּהֶן אֶת הַהַלֵּל. וּשְׁמוֹנָה עָשָׂר יוֹם בַּשָּׁנָה מִצְוָה לִגְמֹר בָּהֶן אֶת הַהַלֵּל. וְאִלּוּ הֵן. שְׁמוֹנַת יְמֵי הֶחָג. וּשְׁמוֹנַת יְמֵי חֲנֻכָּה. וְרִאשׁוֹן שֶׁל פֶּסַח וְיוֹם עֲצֶרֶת. אֲבָל רֹאשׁ הַשָּׁנָה וְיוֹם הַכִּפּוּרִים אֵין בָּהֶן הַלֵּל לְפִי שֶׁהֵן יְמֵי תְּשׁוּבָה וְיִרְאָה וָפַחַד לֹא יְמֵי שִׂמְחָה יְתֵרָה...
(6) 6 And it is not only the Hallel of Chanukah that is from the words of the Scribes. Rather the reading of the Hallel is always from the words of the Scribes on all of the days in which we complete the Hallel. And it is a commandment to complete the Hallel on eighteen days in the year. And these are them: The eight days of the Festival (Sukkot); eight days of Chanukah; the first day of Passover; and the day of [Shavuot]. But there is no Hallel on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur because they are days of repentance, awe and fear - not days of excessive joy. And they did not ordain Hallel on Purim, because the Scroll [of Esther that is read on it] is the Hallel.
However, the Rambam seems to say the opposite in another section of his Yad:
Rambam Shevisas YT, 6:17
(יז) שִׁבְעַת יְמֵי הַפֶּסַח וּשְׁמוֹנַת יְמֵי הֶחָג עִם שְׁאָר יָמִים טוֹבִים כֻּלָּם אֲסוּרִים בְּהֶסְפֵּד וְתַעֲנִית. וְחַיָּב אָדָם לִהְיוֹת בָּהֶן שָׂמֵחַ וְטוֹב לֵב הוּא וּבָנָיו וְאִשְׁתּוֹ וּבְנֵי בֵּיתוֹ וְכָל הַנִּלְוִים עָלָיו שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (דברים טז יד) "וְשָׂמַחְתָּ בְּחַגֶּךָ" וְגוֹ'. אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁהַשִּׂמְחָה הָאֲמוּרָה כָּאן הִיא קָרְבַּן שְׁלָמִים כְּמוֹ שֶׁאָנוּ מְבָאֲרִין בְּהִלְכוֹת חֲגִיגָה יֵשׁ בִּכְלַל אוֹתָהּ שִׂמְחָה לִשְׂמֹחַ הוּא וּבָנָיו וּבְנֵי בֵּיתוֹ כָּל אֶחָד כָּרָאוּי לוֹ:
So, we are now left with three questions:
1 -Is there a Mitzvah to be Happy during these Days?
2 -If there is, then why do we not say 'Moadim B'simcha?
3 -If Rambam says that we should not say Hallel to us not being Happy, then why later (Laws of the Festivals) does he say we ARE to be happy?
Rav Olshin brings an idea from Rav Chaim Solaveitchik of Brisk to answer all of these questions.
There are tow types of happiness.
There is Happiness from a mood, a Simcha that COMES from the outside, like, Moadim B'Simcha, a Yom Tov that naturally makes us happy.
It is this first type, and this type only, that demands a Hallel.
Indeed, Rav Tzvi Pesach Frank, proves this idea from the very words of Rambam quoted above in 'Number 16' as he states, "But there is no Hallel on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur because they are days of repentance, awe and fear - not days of excessive joy ('SIMCHA YESEIRAH"), meaning the ADDED joy, the MOOD, causes the Hallel.
What comes out from all of this is that there are two types of Happiness.
1 -Sometimes if we are lucky we are put into a good mood. If it is a Yom TOv that causes this then we say Hallel. We also then say 'MOadim B'simcha" as the Holiday ITSELF MADE us happy.
2 -However, if the above is not the case, then, while we do not say certain EXTRA praises, we STILL MUST be HAPPY!
Indeed, the entire challenge of these Days is to find such happiness -on our own and without Gd gifting us with it!
This is expressed wonderfully by Rabbi Lichtenstein in two separate articles:
Rav Lichtenstein, Return and Renewal, p. 228:
"So, do we have joy in Teshuvah? We do not have the type of joy that is oblivious to the tragedy, that disregards pain, and that tries to paper over failure.
"All of those agonizing elements are present.
"But transcending all is the fact that we are there, to confront, to be challenged, and to respond.
"And we are there to feel the full power and glory of the momentous encounter between ourselves and and Gd in the experience of Teshuvah...True, Judaism does not prohibit thinking about (tomorrow's) benefits, but we can still idealize the 'l'shmah' aspect....
"While we hope and strove to purify ourselves, first and foremost, we are eternally grateful for -and animated by -the very opportunity to stand lifnei Hashem..."
My father-in-law, Rav Soloveitchik zt"l, would often explain - and even in writing[5] - that we must view the simcha obligation as a mitzva in which the "kiyum" (essential fulfillment) and "ma'aseh" (concrete action/s required) stand apart from one another. … On Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, when there is no possibility of executing the central requirement of eating "shalmei simcha," the mitzva can still be observed through other means, so long as one achieves the emotional kiyum.
AN AMAZING STUDY, Copied from Wikipidia:
"In 1995, a study was carried out by social psychologists Victoria Medvec, Scott Madey and Thomas Gilovich on the effects of counterfactual thinking on the Olympics. The study showed that athletes who won the bronze medal were significantly happier with their winning than those athletes who won the silver medal. The silver medalists were more frustrated because they had missed the gold medal, while the bronze medalists were simply happy to have received any honors at all (instead of no medal for fourth place).
We are all SILVER MEDALISTS, we all think-at times-that someone has it better than us. Never thinking about those that have it worse!
A great example of this study is the follwing quote:
"A rabbi said that he was disturbed by the treatment of the Buffalo Bills in the 90's.
You may remember that they lost four Super bowls within a short period of time.
So they got tagged as losers by comedians and in the press.
But this rabbi pointed out that "[T]heir sin was they were the second greatest football team in the United States for a long span of time."
____________________
The very first time the term SIMCHA is used in the Torah is here:
(כז) לָ֤מָּה נַחְבֵּ֙אתָ֙ לִבְרֹ֔חַ וַתִּגְנֹ֖ב אֹתִ֑י וְלֹא־הִגַּ֣דְתָּ לִּ֔י וָֽאֲשַׁלֵּחֲךָ֛ בְּשִׂמְחָ֥ה וּבְשִׁרִ֖ים בְּתֹ֥ף וּבְכִנּֽוֹר׃
What Lavan could not understand is how one could live their life without a real relationship with one's family; one's in-laws.
He was mistaken.
(א) וַיִּהְיוּ֙ חַיֵּ֣י שָׂרָ֔ה מֵאָ֥ה שָׁנָ֛ה וְעֶשְׂרִ֥ים שָׁנָ֖ה וְשֶׁ֣בַע שָׁנִ֑ים שְׁנֵ֖י חַיֵּ֥י שָׂרָֽה׃
The Netziv ad loc. posits that this is the only time in Tanach we find such a double expression of LIFE. He explains that those who live HAPPY lives, who are content with what they HAVE rather than what they may LACK -like Sarah did -live, as if, a double life -double the years!
Rav Yitzchak Hutner, Igeros V'Kesavim, #128:
