אל האשה אמר וגו'. פירש ר' שלמה ברבי משה, שתהיה בעצבון, ובעמל כל ימיך. וא"ת מאי איכפת לי, הרבה שפחות לשמשני, ת"ל והרונך, על כרחך תהי הרה. וא"ת תלד בשופי, ת"ל בעצב תלדי בנים. וא"ת אשמור עצמי, מליזקק לבעלי, ת"ל ואל אישך תשוקתך. וא"ת אכוף יצרי, ולא אזקק לו. ת"ל והוא ימשל בך, בעל כרחך תזקק לו: אל האשה אמר, “to the woman He had said, etc.” Rabbi Shlomoh son of Rabbi Moshe interpreted the various clauses in this verse as meaning that woman’s life as a result of having seduced her husband into sin would from now on be a never ending experience of pain and travail. As far as her delegating her physical chores to maidservants etc., was concerned, G–d added that the pains associated with pregnancy were something that she could not delegate. She reasoned that at least the act of giving birth would then be a relief from such pain; G–d disabused her of that also. She then reasoned that her hope lay in abstaining from marital intercourse and thus not become pregnant again. G–d told her that she would undergo a psychological change by feeling desirous for marital intercourse with her husband. To the suggestion that she would control her urges for sexual release, G–d retorted that her husband would force her to engage in marital relations with her.
והוא ימשל בך. אמרינן בב"ר, יכול ממשלה מכל צד, ת"ל לא יחבול ריחים ורכב. ופי' ר' יצחק יכול ממשלה מכל צד, שיהא לו רשות למשכן אשתו, ת"ל לא יחבול ריחים ורכב. ואשה נקראת ריחים, כדכתיב, ויהי טוחן בבית האסורים, כדדריש בסוטה, וכתיב, תטחן לאחר אשתי. ובירושלמי, תרגם פסוק זה, לא תמשכנון ריחיא ורכבא, ארי צרכי נפשאתא אינון, ולא תאסור כליין וחתנין, ארום כל דעבד אלין, כמה דכפר בעלמא דאתי. ופי', לא תאסור כליין וחתנין, שאם אירס אשה, לא יניחנה לישב עגונה באירוסין, זמן מרובה: והוא ימשל בך, “he shall rule over you.” We find a statement in B’reyshit Rabbah 20,7 by Rabbi Yossi Ha-g’leelee, (the Galilean) according to which this statement is supposed to be restrictive, -i.e. the husband not having complete control of his wife; he bases himself on an interesting comparison between the upper and lower millstones in Deuteronomy 24,6. He views the prohibition of a lender taking both of these millstones as security for an overdue loan, and the previous verse ordering a husband to please his wife for a whole year after they get married, and the Torah describing taking both millstones as equivalent to robbing the lender of his life, נפש, as proof that the husband–wife relationship must at all times remain one in which the wife continues to love her husband to the point of seeking physical union with him. He adds that we know that a woman is compared to the lower of the two millstones by citing a verse from Job 31,10: תטחן ואחר אשתי, “may my wife grind for another.” According to the Talmud tractate Sotah, Judges 16,21, where Samson’s suffering at the hands of the Philistines is described with the words: ויהי טוחן בבית האסירים, “he had to act as a grindstone in the jail,” which Rabbi Yossi understands as a chore that a husband must not impose on his wife, even so he is described as “ruling over her.” The Jerusalem Talmud interprets Deut. 24,6 as referring to anything that is a basic necessity for a person’s economic survival as being prohibited to be taken as a pledge, a millstone serving as an example of such necessities. The Jerusalem Targum also considers letting a woman to whom one is betrothed to be married wait for more than a year before the wedding is performed as a violation of the commandment discussed in this verse.