אהבה ושנאה

(2) The quality of love involves more deeds than all the other qualities. And when a man uses the quality of love for evil there is not a single quality so evil. But when a man uses the quality of his love for good, then that quality is higher than all others, as it is written : "And you shall love the Lord your God" (Deut. 6:5). And there is no greater virtue in the Service of the Creator than he who serves Him out of love.

(3) And now listen how love can spoil good deeds when his love is stronger than his wisdom. For there are all sorts of different kinds of love. One love is the love of a man for his children, and because of his great love, he may not correct them and guide them to the good path, and he permits them to go in the obstinacy of their evil hearts, and out of this can come great harm.

(4) The second love is the love for money, and because of his great desire for money, his business dealings may not be honest and he covets, plunders, and robs, in order to amass wealth. And because of his great longing for wealth he closes his hand from giving alms and is miserly.

(5) The third love is the love of men for their wives. And if a man has a bad wife — conceited and self-centered — she may remove from his heart the desire to fulfill the commandments and draw him after her. And because of his great love for her he is not firm with her and listens to her counsel, and she can bring him to evil acts. And it can also happen that a man, because of his great love of women, will gaze at them constantly and speak disgraceful things and come to immoral conduct.

(6) The fourth love is the love of a man for his relatives — his father and his mother, his brothers and his sisters and the rest of his kind, friends and companions, and because of his love for them he helps them in their quarrels, and does not feel, nor does he ascertain whether or not his relatives did wrong against the other party of the quarrel, but always helps, protects and shelters them. And even if they have broken forth into wild and boisterous conduct, he protects them. And he may even listen to their advice, and even if the advice is not good he will not turn away from their words. He may even want to raise them to positions for which they are not fitted — for example, to make them rulers and leaders of their generations, to dominate and govern the people. And even if they are wicked, he does not sense it, for love blinds his eyes and makes deaf his ears, and there is, in this nepotism, great damage, for they will cause others to go astray in this same folly.

(7) The fifth love is the love for long life, and because he loves mere existence so much he will not stand up in a trial that involves danger.

(8) The sixth love is the love of honor, and he who loves honor will not do his good deeds for the sake of God, but in all the commandments, or good deeds he does — whether it be philanthropy or studying or supporting Torah, or the value of the commandments, his thoughts and intentions will be fixed on receiving praise and honor and he will want people to give him a crown and greatness, and this is a great flaw in the Service of God. Even he who has great knowledge of the Torah and many good deeds — the pursuit of honor removes him from the world. How much uglier is the pursuit of honor by one who is devoid of Torah and good deeds.

(9) And there is a seventh love — which is the worst of all loves — and that is the love of pleasure and amusement — like eating, drinking, and other pleasures of the senses like immoral conduct and pleasure excursions. And it is not necessary to dwell on this matter because he who loves wine to the point of drunkenness and eats only the daintiest of foods and goes constantly to parties and feasts will undoubtedly forget his Creator, as it is written: "And (when) you shall eat and drink … guard yourself lest you forget the Lord" (Deut. 6:11-12). "And (when) you shall eat and be satisfied … guard yourself lest your heart be deceived and you turn aside and serve other gods" (Ibid. 11:15-16). And it is written: "But where Jeshurun grew fat he kicked" (Ibid., 32:15).

(1) This happened sometime afterward: Absalom son of David had a beautiful sister named Tamar, and Amnon son of David became infatuated with her. (2) Amnon was so distraught because of his [half-]sister Tamar that he became sick; for she was a virgin, and it seemed impossible to Amnon to do anything to her. (3) Amnon had a friend named Jonadab, the son of David’s brother Shimah; Jonadab was a very clever man. (4) He asked him, “Why are you so dejected, O prince, morning after morning? Tell me!” Amnon replied, “I am in love with Tamar, the sister of my brother Absalom!” (5) Jonadab said to him, “Lie down in your bed and pretend you are sick. When your father comes to see you, say to him, ‘Let my sister Tamar come and give me something to eat. Let her prepare the food in front of me, so that I may look on, and let her serve it to me.’” (6) Amnon lay down and pretended to be sick. The king came to see him, and Amnon said to the king, “Let my sister Tamar come and prepare a couple of cakes in front of me, and let her bring them to me.” (7) David sent a message to Tamar in the palace, “Please go to the house of your brother Amnon and prepare some food for him.” (8) Tamar went to the house of her brother Amnon, who was in bed. She took dough and kneaded it into cakes in front of him, and cooked the cakes. (9) She took the pan and set out [the cakes], but Amnon refused to eat and ordered everyone to withdraw. After everyone had withdrawn, (10) Amnon said to Tamar, “Bring the food inside and feed me.” Tamar took the cakes she had made and brought them to her brother inside. (11) But when she served them to him, he caught hold of her and said to her, “Come lie with me, sister.” (12) But she said to him, “Don’t, brother. Don’t force me. Such things are not done in Israel! Don’t do such a vile thing! (13) Where will I carry my shame? And you, you will be like any of the scoundrels in Israel! Please, speak to the king; he will not refuse me to you.” (14) But he would not listen to her; he overpowered her and lay with her by force. (15) Then Amnon felt a very great loathing for her; indeed, his loathing for her was greater than the passion he had felt for her. And Amnon said to her, “Get out!” (16) She pleaded with him, “Please don’t commit this wrong; to send me away would be even worse than the first wrong you committed against me.” But he would not listen to her. (17) He summoned his young attendant and said, “Get that woman out of my presence, and bar the door behind her.”

(67) Isaac then brought her into the tent of his mother Sarah, and he took Rebekah as his wife. Isaac loved her, and thus found comfort after his mother’s death.

(8) I adjure you, O maidens of Jerusalem! If you meet my beloved, tell him this: That I am faint with love.

(16) All love that depends on a something, [when the] thing ceases, [the] love ceases; and [all love] that does not depend on anything, will never cease. What is an example of love that depended on a something? Such was the love of Amnon for Tamar. And what is an example of love that did not depend on anything? Such was the love of David and Jonathan.